


Blood On Ice

by swbloodwolf



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: Bullying, Can be read as slash, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Evan whump, Friendship, Gaming, Hockey, Ice Skating, M/M, Other, Real Life, Rynx, YouTubers - Freeform, concerned Delirious, evans kinda depressed, friends - Freeform, ice hockey, injuries, kinda self-destruction, some violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-06-25 10:04:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15638505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swbloodwolf/pseuds/swbloodwolf
Summary: Evans been kinda down lately. Jonathan helps him get back to playing hockey and it's going great until it's not. Can Evan go back to what he had? Or is something lost forever.





	1. The Idea

It was pure coincidence that for just a few minutes, Evan and Jonathan were the only two on Discord. What with Delirious's back to front sleep schedule and Evans busy life of music and YouTube, it was a sheer accident. But Jonathan was grateful for the timing as he got to hear the effort in the words Evan was sprouting and knew something was wrong.  
With a frown Jonathan interrupted the frustrating pretence. "What's going on Vanoss you ok? And Don't say you're tired!"  
"I AM tired." His friend protested to which Jonathan shook his head despite his friends incapability of seeing.  
"Ok well why are you always tired?"  
"I-"  
Jonathan didn't want to hear the reason, he knew. "Bitch shut up. Its because you work too hard."  
Evan didn't try any excuse in reply this time. Delirious wondered if the silence meant agreement.  
"I'll tell you why it is," his tone softened with the friendly concern he wanted to convey.  
He could all but hear Evans face in his hands from the mans drawn out 'why?'  
"Because," Jonathan began. "You don't do anything just for you, that you enjoy." His conclusion was meet with more silence so he continued before he lost the rare spark of thought. "You've made everything into work. Games, music. When you got big gaming, you could still relax and tune out through your music and remixes but that's just more work now. Not that there's anything wrong with that." He quickly supplied knowing Rynx could be a touchy subject with Evan.  
"But you haven't got a personal outlet now without it being apart of something bigger." He finished and waited for either a smart ass comment mocking him or even less likely; agreement. But again there was only silence.  
"Evan?" He asked cautiously, eyes briefly darting to the check the call was still connected.  
Finally a loud exhale came forth from the other end.  
"Okay."  
He sat up. "Okay? Is that it?!"  
"Okay..." Evan continued, voice tinged with slight impatience. "You might be onto something. Good to know there's stuff going on in that head of yours apart from Fortnight."  
Delirious let out one of his unique chuckles. "Hey! It's been known to happen owl boy!"  
Evan gave the smallest huff of a laugh in return, at least it was something before silence sat between them once more. They listened to each other breathe, miles apart.  
"Sooo what are ya gonna do?" Jonathan finally nudged his friend into action.  
"I dunno," Evan admitted around a mouthful of food. "Find a new hobby I suppose."  
Delirious's gafauffed at that, "Like you haven't already mastered everything in the world. Besides what about hockey, one of you're great loves remember?How long since you've been on the ice?"  
Vanoss sighed as if he really was talking of a long lost lover. "Too long man, too long."  
"Well..." Delirious let the thought hang and through Evans chewing of food he could almost hear the other man thinking.  
"I'm an idiot." Evan finally concluded.  
"You are," Jonathan agreed in all seriousness.  
"I can't believe you just gave good advice though." The other said with a laugh to try and ease the tension.  
"Hey!!!" He protested and smiled at hearing the Canadian truly laugh this time. "You might be an owl, but I'm still older and wiser then you."  
"Yeah man," Evan replied and Jon relaxed hearing the pep return to his friends voice.  
Both noticed Nogla and Brian joined discord. Quickly they sobered up from the deep conversation.  
"Hey man, thanks." Evan quickly added in a casual tone as the others noisily arrived. "Means a lot."  
Jonathan smiled, despite the rabble of the other guys own conversations in his ear he felt like him and Evan were the only two people talking. "Your welcome buddy."  
"WHY IS HE W'LCOM," heralded the typical loud Irish introduction of Nogla. "What'd he do?!"  
"Oh, just gave me some good advice Nogla. And since he's here, hopefully he'll be staying for some death run?"  
Delirious was happy to move past the seriousness of the previous conversation and get to the usual carefree banter of their YouTubing careers.  
"Count me in bitches! I'm gonna kill all o' you!" He shouted into the fray as Nogla tried to sell himself to Evan as the best 'advice giver'. Evan was once again laughing.


	2. What the hell did that mean?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its building

The gang were messaging back and fourth trying to organise a typical late night game session. Now they were all fighting over what exactly to play. It was team Fortnight against 'Not fucking Fortnight!'  
Evans name popped up in the chat. He would no doubt be the deciding vote. Delirious waited eagerly but was quickly disappointed with the answer.   
"Count me out guys I've got a lot on. Don't see any free time soon either so don't worry about rescheduling."  
Everyone replied with different emojis, expletives and 'boo's'.   
Delirious texted Evan directly instead. "U k?"  
Just as he put his phone back down it rang and quickly answered seeing Evans name.  
"Hey"  
"Hi!" Evan's cheery reply immediately soothed Jonathan's worry. He could hear his friend breathing and walking on the other end.   
"What are you up to?"  
"Just finished at the gym."  
"And just like that you've made me feel like shit." Jonathan said exasperated.   
Evan laughed and Jon could tell he'd hopped into his car.   
"You're busy sorry." He supplied after a pause but Evan was quick to reassure him.   
"No man it's cool. You know I'm always good to talk."  
"Yeah a little too much," Delirious admitted. "I still think of that time you were in the shower."  
He was meet with silence and quickly realised what he said. "Not like that! I'm mean-"  
"Yeah yeah I know what you meant."  
He could hear the Canadian's shaky breaths and pictured so clearly his friend in black beanie, hands in front of the car fan, surrounded by snow.   
"Cold?" He asked and his friend chuckled.   
"Always. So um, I took your advice from a few months ago."  
"You back playing hockey!" Jon didn't even try to hide his appeasement.   
"Not quite. Still just training hard at the moment before the season starts. I'm a little behind and definitely out of practice. Ugh I didn't realise how fit I use to be."  
Jonathan groaned, he had been worried Evan would do this. "It's meant to be how you relax Evan! Not run yourself ragged. You're hobby! But oh no you never do anything by halves do you? Don't take everything so serious!" Now he could clearly see his friend sitting in the car, still surrounded by snow but now drawn and tired.   
"Jonathan this is hockey! It's rough and tumble! And exhausting. I'm just getting fit to keep up. And I am enjoying it, being back on the ice," he paused and Jonathan knew Evan was about to do something rare; divulge himself.   
"Being on the ice, it is relaxing. Everything else stops and I just play without thinking. I really do enjoy it. It feels like flying. This training is just to get to that point. It's fine Jon."  
Jonathan sighed. Moving from his computer to the kitchen for food. "Just promise me you're not pushing too hard."  
"Dude. I've being doing this my whole life. I know how to train healthy."  
Jonathan had to laugh at that, "Well I'll have to trust you on that. Never set foot in a gym." He opened the fridge and squinted inside. "You're not gonna get real big again are you?" His hand flew to his mouth but it was too late. Shit! Why'd he say that?!  
"What does that mean?!"  
"I dunno! I'm kinda distracted!" He tried to laugh it off but slammed the fridge door shut in frustration.   
"Alright, well. I have to get home so I'll talk to ya later."   
Jon heard the car start through the phone, "Evan wait-".  
"All good Delirious! It's fine."   
He almost believed him.   
"I'll talk later. Bye!"  
"Bye," he mumbled in reply and heard the line die. He thumped his head against the fridge.   
"Fuck me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for present and/or future mistakes


	3. Ouch

The days were getting colder Jonathan noted after being out getting groceries. Switching his computer back on he started to make food in preparation of recording gameplay for a few hours.  
By the time he swivelled onto his office chair everyone was beginning to join the session. Bickering and chattering he mumbled in a few words around his food. Evan joined last. He noticed he was quiet but didn't dare say anything. They'd never mentioned the awkward conversation from months ago which Jonathan was beyond thankful for, but he also regretted not being brave enough to try and explain himself. He just hoped Evan had really forgotten the whole thing. It was just stupid words. Meanwhile Evan had otherwise been quite chipper the past few months for which he credited playing hockey once more. So the last thing Delirious wanted was to ruin his friends delicate self-esteem.   
Evans 'narrator' voice suddenly stole him from his tumbling thoughts. "Alright alright ladies and gentlemen. We're back with another Scary Map."  
"Oooooooo," Marcel supplied trying to add dramatic effect to the otherwise not at all scary looking lobby.   
"Hold on hold on I'm not recording you bastards you knew I was afk. I'm not here yet," Terroriser broke the spell as only his brash accent could.   
"Then you wont see me do this," Vanoss said and with the sportsman reflexes only Evan possessed his gmod character whipped out his shotgun and in a explosion of blood sent Terrorisers avatar flying out of shot.   
Delirious almost chocked laughing and the others reeled with laughter as well. Evan merely chuckled by Brian was already furious.  
"Not even a minute in and you're already making me wanna kill you you bastard!"  
"Ha!" Evan burst with a breathy loud laugh then shot Brian again. The others broke into laughter as Evan tried to keep going. "Okay alright as I was saying, another Scary Map. You all know how this goes; we've wasted enough time. Lets. go. Would someone like to read the intro."  
They all turned to Terroriser who stayed still and silent in rebellion.   
"Okay," Jonathan broke in, trying to keep the ball rolling. "I'm ready! I'm ready, let's GO!"

An hour and a bit later and they were stuck looking for numbers to get through a pin pad locked door. Delirious was getting frustrated at how hard he was trying to get Evan to laugh but was getting nothing in return. On top of which nothing had been that scary.   
Currently they were crouching through a vent with Evan at the front when suddenly a scream ripped through all their headphones and Evan yelled in reaction. Jonathan jumped more from the scream from Evan than the game.   
"Jesus fuck! Shit fuck ow fucking oww Jesus."  
"What was that?" Marcel cried.   
"Jesus Evan you scared me more then that bloody jpg." Terroriser gushed in.   
"Why did you say 'ow'?" Delirious added to the fray, confused. "You spilt coffee or something?"  
"Probably kicked himself," Terroriser supplied but Evan interrupted panting.   
"No no, I-" he chuckled but gasped. "I've hurt my ribs it hurts to laugh. Or scream apparently." He laughed harder apparently finding the predicament funny but Delirious frowned. "How'd you hurt your ribs? Why are you playing this then?!"   
"It's fine, it's fine. It's allll ok just," he paused and seemed to gulp. "Just fine. Rough play at hockey is all. I've been trying not to laugh so hard this whole time actually but you've made it a bitch Delirious!"  
"ME?! How is this my fault?"  
"Alright, alright ladies. Let's just finish this bloody no-good-content map. Some of us want to sleep ya know." Brian luckily interrupted, easing the tension. Delirious kept his mouth shut apparently not being able to do anything right. Marcel had to say something as well, "Way to be sympathetic Brian."  
"It's fine guys," Evan was no longer laughing now the attention was too much on real him and not the game. "Let's just get out of this damn vent and this whole asylum. I'm sick of this sheeet."  
Just as he said that he got to the end of the vent and fell through the floor with another surprised yell. They all laughed once more, conversation forgotten but Delirious couldn't un-hear Evan's slightly pained laughs and he ground his teeth every time. He was not going to say anything this time.


	4. Meet up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just realised the formatting of this chapter got lost so hopefully it's fixed

Months later Jonathan found himself drinking coffee at some hipster joint in LA. He'd been summoned from North Carolina on YouTube business but that had finished about an hour ago. Now he was a little lost, unsure what to do with himself now he was here and free.  
He had sent a text to Evan an hour ago to see if he was in the area but had yet heard back. He refused to believe the lack of reply was making him jittery and instead blamed it on his second coffee.  
He was just about to text Miniladd instead when Evan replied.  
 _'Yeah I'm in town. Are you?!'_  
Jonathan chuckled at Evans disbelief that his friend was somewhere other then in his house and in front of his computer.  
 _'Don't sound so shocked! Yes I'm in LA and bored and lonely and scared. Where u?'_  
He watched Evan type.  
 _'I'm up for the week with music and 3BB stuff. Wanna come to mine?'_  
Jonathan sat up straight in his booth with excitement and quickly closed and dismissed the page on his phone of flights back home. He racked his brain trying to remember the address of Evans rented house. Not having been there for years. But Evan seemed to have read his thoughts and forwarded him an address from google maps.  
 _'Come over whenever,'_ he added _. 'I'm here all day.'_  
Jonathan grinned in delight and found an Uber while finishing his drink and paying.  
Outside the weather had changed to thunderclouds. His Uber arrived and sitting in the back of the car with a thankfully silent driver, he texted Evan that he was on his way.  
He couldn't blame his nervousness on the coffee. He hadn't actually seen his friend in almost two years. Sure they saw each other on webcams time to time to catch up more personally. But actually being in Vanoss's presence? it had been a while. And there'd always been other people around.  
Looking up from his phone he noticed they were heading into the Hollywood hills. Jonathan frowned checking the address again but realising they were heading in the right direction and he wasn't being kidnapped. They pulled up to something just like in GTA and Delirious couldn't help but shake his head. Evan was pretty humble guy about what he could afford but sometimes...  
He fumbled with his overnight bag getting out of the car and mumbling a thank you to the sunglasses wearing driver even though it was dark with the coming rain.  
The house was white with lush garden and high fences featuring old fashioned lamps. He rang the doorbell and texted Evan just to be sure.  
 _'I've rang the doorbell but I don't think it matters cause there's no way you're HERE.'_  
He actually heard Evan's laughter on the other side of the door and his heart lurched unexpectedly and all but failed when the door opened and Evan was there. Just in front of him. Arm hanging off the open door, black shirt and jeans and cap and smiling with his perfect whites all on show. It was almost too much.  
"Delirious," he said with that hint of mirth in his voice and it broke Jon from his star struck spell. This was just his Evan, not some Hollywood superstar and suddenly he threw himself at his friend.  
"Evan!" Delight clear in his voice as he put his arms around his friend and felt Vanoss's strong arms in return. They patted each other on the back and actually swayed in their embrace. Eventually Evan held his friend at arms length and Delirious knew his smile was a replica of his friends.  
"First time you've left the house in months?" Evan joked and Delirious laughed giving his friend a half-hearted push away. "No. I do have a relatively normal life ya know! You're looking amazing as usual." He gruffed picking his bag back off the ground from where it had been forgotten and dropped.  
Evan stepped aside gesturing Jonathan to enter. "Not too big I hope?" He joked and just like that Jonathan felt a rush of heat from embarrassment. Piled on from the original cringe of having said it in the first place and continuing to ignore it and not bring it up with his friend in the hope he'd forgotten, added to now for the fucker to casually mention it face to face, with no where to hide months later. All of that rushed through Jon in an instant and burned his cheeks leaving his mouth to lamely stutter. "No, no I-"  
He looked at Evan. No he wasn't as big as he used to be playing hockey. He was fit. But not Captain America big. He was stuck looking at his friends biceps with his mouth hanging open and he felt it but couldn't seem to do anything about it.  
Evan shut the door. Was all this because of Jon's stupid nonsical passing comment?  
"Like I said, all good man," Evan grabbed the bag from his shoulder and Delirious could do nothing but let him. "Didn't want too be that heavy again either. Wrecked my ankles."  
Jonathan awkwardly laughed as that's what seemed appropriate and followed his friend into the mansion still shocked at how quickly the pleasant greeting had been thrown out the window and left him embarrassed and guilty. He usually admired Evan's memory for detail, especially around Christmas when his gifts twigged at Delirious's heart. But right now he hated and cursed it and desperately tried to think of what to do next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually going somewhere trust me.  
> Also it's way to easy to write these two as slash. Not doing it on purpose but y'all get enjoyment out of it if that's your thing ;)


	5. Unwind

Evan showed him around. Explaining that he had the mansion for two weeks to hold a few parties to placate all the people who usually wanted to party up in Canada with him. A bridge half way apparently.   
The place was huge with a grand staircase in the foyer and five guest bedrooms, all with their own ensuite and TVs. Delirious gushed over the pool and spa the most and wished he bought swimming trunks.   
Evan laughed at his enthusiasm and Delirious revealed in the sound. They stood for a moment up against the big glass windows and watched the rain fall over Hollywood. It scattered on the pool surface and dulled everything in a blue glow.   
"Are you staying?" Evan broke the silence but barely. His voice was low and when Jon looked over he was still gazing out. Juxtaposed to his energy just early; he now looked on the verge of tears.   
"Yeah, yeah I'll stay." He didn't know what to do. How to help and by God he wanted to help. "I haven't booked my flight back yet so as long as you'll have me..." He let it hang and like a magic trick Vanoss appeared, turning to him with a genuine smile.   
"Cool man, get comfortable. I have to make a quick phone call." He pulled out his phone and wondered off. Delirious made his way over to the couches and flopped down with an exaggerated sigh. Evan's guitars sat near by and he resisted the pulsing urge to reach out and touch them. Instead he texted Toons what he was doing.   
His stomach gurgled just as Evan came back but he must of heard and laughed.   
"Hungry man?"  
"Starving." He almost whinged.   
"Well I've just ordered a weeks groceries but that's coming until later and all I've got is porridge and healthy shit you'll probably hate."  
Jonathan must have made a face cause Evan did one of his single, explosive laughs.   
"Can we order pizza or something?" He all but begged and saw something he thought he would never see; at the word 'pizza' Evan minutely tensed.   
"Okay who are you and what have you done with the real Vanoss. I said pizza and you're not screaming agreement."  
Evan looked down, "I can't. I shouldn't."  
And maybe it was the sudden shift in lighting but his cheeks suddenly appeared hollow.   
This mother fucking hockey, what have I done? Delirious thought but out loud he said, "You on...a diet? Or something?"  
Evan actually sighed in despair and finally joined Jon on the couch.   
His arms made an empty gestures. "Twelve percent or under body fat."  
"What?!" Delirious's outraged broke Evan's sorrow. "You're not anywhere near that. You can't have one pizza?! This is unacceptable. How can you live?!"  
Vanoss visibly huffed and crossed his thick arms over his deep chest. "I know man but it's like getting off drugs, I need to be completely cold turkey otherwise I'm back hooked."   
Delirious put a hand on his friends shoulder and ignored the slight flinch. "I'm so sorry for you loss."  
Evan laughed and half-heartedly shoved him away. "Thanks man."  
Jon's stomach decided to gargle once more.   
Evan growled. "Fuck it. I'm here with my friend. He's hungry and wants pizza, I'm getting pizza." He whipped out his phone and suddenly Jonathan's stomach was coiled with guilt instead.   
"Evan if you shouldn't, I don't wanna be the cause-"  
His friend shook his head. Once he had his mind set, there was nothing anyone could convince of otherwise. Especially when it came to food.   
"Just stop me from eating too much ok?"  
Delirious reached for the TV remote and opened Netflix.   
"Don't worry, I'll help you buddy."

It was dark inside and out. Neither had bothered to turn on any lights. The action movie Delirious had chosen was only halfway through but seemed to be going for ever. The pizza, split evenly between the two, was long gone despite the lingering greasy smell.  
Jon was regretting his movie choice.   
"You wanna keep watching this?" He asked Vanoss who was next to him. When there was no reply he glanced over to his friend only to discover he had fallen asleep, sprawled almost horizontal on the couch under the big blanket they were sharing.   
And for the first time in there friendship, Jonathan could stare at his friend. And he felt no shame doing so. It was quite and they were alone, so he allowed himself the rare moment to truly study Evan's features against the backdrop of LAs lights.   
His thick lashes lay softly against his high cheeks as his mouth puffed slightly open in his sleep. His breathing was slow and heavy and he actually looked relax despite the flashes of colour and light playing across his face from the TV.  
Delirious didn't dare wake him. He checked the time on his phone. It wasn't that late. He swapped to a shorter movie he knew well and decided to wake Evan by the time it finished if he hadn't already. At the moment, it was far too cosy under the blanket to move.

The credits began to roll and Delirious sighed deeply. Evan hadn't stirred, clearly out of it, but he should really be in a proper bed. Jon left the credits to roll instead of turning on a light, and slowly stretched his back and arms. He was not looking forward to this.   
He removed himself from the warm nest and put a hand on Evan's shoulder. No response. He gently shook it.   
"Come on Evan, let's get you to bed."  
His friend actually frowned as he started waking up and Delirious couldn't help but let out a soft chuckle. It was undeniably adorable.   
"D'lirious?" His friend slurred and bought a hand up to rub his blinking eyes. "What are you doing here?"  
Jon let out a full laugh now. "You're not at home Evan. We're in LA. You invited me over and then fell asleep."  
His friend sat up slightly and frowned as he looked around at his surroundings. "Oh my god." He said in exasperation rather then shock. Delirious felt a little evil pulling the blanket off him.  
"Come on bitch, time for bed." He offered a hand up which Vanoss took. Wincing a bit with presumably stiffness as he got to his feet.   
"See?" Delirious said. "You need a proper bed, come on big fella up the stairs."  
Standing behind him, he put both hands on Evan's shoulders and guided the stumbling man over to the stairs. They giggled and carried on the whole way to the top with Evan finding it endlessly hilarious to stop in his tracks randomly and have Jon smack into him from behind like a brick wall. Finally reaching the landing, Delirious had to stop the two man conga line.   
"Uhhhh which one is yours?" Spinning them both around looking at all the doors in the hallway.   
Evan was giggling trying to point despite the continued circles. Delirious stopped and pushing the younger mans forwarded, propelled him the short distance to the door. Evan caught the door knob on the second try and leaned on the door as he turned back.   
"Alright, see you in the morning." He was just stepping into his dark room as Jon looked around in slight panic.   
"Wait?!"  
Evan paused, one sleepy eyebrow raised.   
"Which one's  _my_ room?!"   
Evan laughed and almost fell over swinging on the half opened door. He pointed at the one opposite.   
"I think I chucked your shit in there"  
"You think?! Evan!" His friend shut his door but could be heard still laughing from the other side.   
"There's a jillion rooms in this place! Evan!"  
"Night Delirious!!" Vanoss yelled back. Jon chuckled and opened his own door. "Good night Evan," he replied quietly, eyes landing on his stuff next to the freshly made bed.


	6. Instant Worry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope people are liking this  
> Sorry for any and all inaccuracies

It was a Thursday night and Jon was watching Evan play hockey. He didn't quite understand all the rules but got the general gist of it. The commentators helped him know if something was bad or good but he was really only focused on Evan's contribution.   
His eyes followed his friend, able to easily pick him out from the way he moved. He played like his avatar in GTA or Gmod; quick feet and faster reflexes. Hanging back to observe so he could jump in at the right time.  
It caught Delirious off guard. Seeing how Evan's online characters were an extension of himself. It was a connection he'd never observed before and he couldn't look away. He even laughed out loud when Evan feigned direction or tricked other players, leaving them stumbling after him. It was hilarious for Jon; knowing himself how frustrating Vanoss was but seeing Evan do the same to other people in real life was beyond amusing.   
He was good, getting a few goals and assisting a dozen more. Going by the teams reaction of skidding together for a quick celebration made Jon realised his friend had just gotten another one. The camera continued to follow Evan who moved back to position, head down and clearly tiring as the game came close to its end.   
Jon himself yawned, just watching the fast pace game was making _him_ tired and yet Vanoss was already off again, sprinting across the ice on his blades.   
Pride filled Jon listening to the commentators describe Evan as flying. It was accurate; his speed unmatched as he outstripped the opponents and had a clear shot for goal. He really was an owl, silent, quick but deadly. Delirious couldn't help but chuckle at the thought.   
But it all quickly changed as the commentators cried out as Evan was slammed into the barrier by the guy chasing after him. The crowd themselves voiced a chorus of 'Oooo's' at the nasty collision. Evan stumbled over legs and hockey sticks just managing to catch his feet when the player slammed into him again forcing Evan to fall sideways with a whack to the ice. The referees and team mates had caught up and the attacker was pulled away. One of Evan's team mates helped him up but the others just watched, not too concerned it seemed.   
Back in North Carolina though Delirious was fuming, his fists were clenched and he was sitting on the edge of his computer chair. He glared at the attacker, wishing beyond anything that he could hop through the screen and fuck the guy up.   
Evan was being escorted off the ice, nodding reassurance to a player but clearly shaken and clutching his shoulder.  
Delirious shut the whole thing off. And was left in the darkness of his room. Breathing hard he questioned the lack of concern those there were showing. He didn't watch hockey so assumed it was perhaps common place. But Evan was specifically targeted! The commentators and refs were the only ones who seemed to jump to help.   
Jon reached for his phone and was just about to send a text to Evan before realising how stupid it was. He just saw Evan on the ice, he wouldn't get his text. And what would he say?!  
 _"Oh hey, just saw what happened I'm so worried about you please stop playing?"_  
Delirious shook his head, as much as it pained him he would have to wait until Evan contacted him.   
But should he even bring it up? It was Vanoss's personal life, his own decisions. Outside of YouTube work and typical friendship stuff the guys left each other to themselves.   
Evan couldn't find out he'd been watching and worrying. Like he was some overprotective mother. Sport was rough, he had to just bite his tongue and let him go. But he couldn't help but think back to LA. When he accidentally saw Evan shirtless by the pool early the next morning. He knows it was an accident because no way did Evan mean for him to see the large bruising on his side and shoulder. Bruises that now Delirious could match to the violence he just saw.

All night he worried about his friend. Thinking about privacy and life outside of YouTube and how independent Evan was and whether that was a boundary worth crossing. Because no matter how many people Vanoss was around, in the end he was internally a loner with no one to really look after him. That's why it was always a relief to see him at Wildcats or with the others, knowing the guys would say something if needed.  
Was this his turn to say something? Because despite all his self-talk to let his friend be — and being the one to have encouraged him in the first place — Jonathan had a nagging feeling that something else was going on. And that Evan would not save himself if he was in trouble.


	7. Okay I'm not fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all getting to much. Evan starts to break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About 2 chapters left? So let me hear some of your thoughts before it ends

Evan was 'busy' over the next few days. He didn't play with the group but admitted to Delirious that he was tired and just needed to catch up on sleep and a few other things. Eventually that expanded to Evan admitting to only Jon that he'd been _"bashed up a bit playing hockey"_ and was resting for the week.   
A few days later he called Delirious again almost sobbing.   
"What's happened?!" He could hear Evan barely keeping his emotions in check on the other end. Delirious wished he wouldn't. Wished his friend knew it was okay to show his fears, anger or sadness.   
"It's okay Evan it's alright. Just tell me you're okay."  
His friend took a shaky breath. "I'm okay."  
"Okay, well-"  
"No I'm not, I mean- I don't know fuck." His words were tormented. It was heartbreaking.   
"Where are you Evan?" Delirious asked as he got in his own car after putting the shopping in the trunk. He closed the door, instantly feeling safe in the quietness and warmth of his car despite the business of the car park.   
"I'm at home."  
Delirious deflated with relief. His friend was also safe.   
"Okay do you think you can tell me what's wrong or you just want me to talk about random shit till you forget about it and calm down."  
"Please just talk about random shit." Evan pleaded softly.   
It took all Jon's control to force a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood. "That; I'm an expert at."   
Evan gave a short breathy laugh that didn't hide his upset at all, but it was a laugh non the less.   
Delirious — mind going blank — began by just listing off all the food he just bought and why certain products were better then others and what he was going to make for dinner. He then continued on to talking about having to clean his pool and how the day after he did it the neighbours tree got chopped down and all the leaves and branches fell straight into his squeaky clean pool. That got a laugh from Evan.   
Next he talked about the games he wanted to play and what improvements current games needed just as he drove into his driveway. His mouth was dry and he had run out of things to say. He turned the car off but kept the Bluetooth on.   
"I know it's gonna sound strange; but for once I don't know what to say next."  
Evan was quiet but not a stressed silence, he was finally relaxed, humming in reply.   
Jon could hear his car engine ticking as it cooled before Evan finally took a deep breath, breaking the silence. "Something bad's happened and I don't know what to do."  
The words set Delirious's heart racing but he tried to keep the panic from his voice. He had to be calm and strong.   
"What's happened?"  
Evan signed again. "It's to do with hockey...And YouTube. Fucking everything really."  
He paused by Delirious waited.   
"Some fans found out I was playing again. And at first I wasn't too worried, it was merely coincidence that they were at the game and knew who I was and there was only a few at the start. I acknowledged them but didn't sign anything or get photos. Next game there was more of them," Evan paused, Delirious gritted his teeth.  
"Then the next game there were even more and they were cheering for me every time I got near the puck and the other teams hated it. Then it kept happening and then _my_ team began to hate it."   
Evan was close to tears, Jon could hear it in his friends frustrated words and shaky breathes as his worry escalated once more.   
"I mean what can I do? The fans are allowed to be there, I don't wanna quit because of them but every time they cheer my name the others bash into me harder. My own team hates me and they're trying to bully me out and it's horrible. They can't stand me having all the attention and I've told them I can't stand it either but they- I don't know what to do Jon."  
His friend chocked, then sobbed then was actually openly crying alone in his big house in Canada and Delirious was so lost sitting in his car, listening to it all so so far away.   
His mind was racing. What could he say? What could he do?   
"Evan, Evan listen to me it's okay. It's gonna be okay, I promise. I'll come over."  
"No don't Jonathan! You don't have to, I'm sorry forget it, you just bought all that food!"   
Jon couldn't help it, he burst out laughing. His friend's consideration for others was sometimes stupidly astounding.   
"It's just food! Don't worry about it! I'm coming to help you. I don't know what I can do exactly but I definitely know I'm not leaving you alone like this."  
"Delirious-"  
"No Evan, you can't expect me to hang up this phone and go back to my computer after hearing all this. Unless you have a good reason for me not to come, I'm coming."  
Evan was breathing through his mouth and loudly sniffing as he considered.   
Jon closed his eyes.   
"Okay man. Okay," Evan whispered.   
"Okay?" Jon opened his eyes.  
"Okay."


	8. We're both sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't have as much time for multiple read throughs so I apologise for any errors.

Evan picked him up at the airport and proceeded to drive Delirious home. It was a crisp morning in Canada and although Jon had previously been tired from his flight, not long being in the company of his friend soon had him feeling awake and energetic once more.   
They talked about games, as they always seemed to yet for the whole drive, Delirious was distracted by the real conversation he wanted to have playing out in the back of his mind. Because unlike movies or fictions make out, no one ever say what they mean or need to, not directly. Instead they always scatter around the edges and at moments like these it infuriated Jonathan to no end that he could not just say to his friend what he wanted to say.   
He wanted to comfort Evan, give advice and yell at him then tell him how much he needs their friendships. Instead he let his presence do the comforting and the easy chatter fulfill the rest.   
They pulled up to Evan's house. Delirious was quick to grab his bag before his friend dared, noting how stiffly Evan had gotten in and out of the car.   
"Ah, the owls nest at last." He said at the door step while Evan fumbled with keys.   
"I think you mean Night Owl's cave, or treehouse." He corrected as they made their way in. "Night Owl's treehouse is in a bit of a mess though. You'll have to forgive him."  
Delirious waved away his friend's concern. "Don't worry about it. Batcoon lives in a dumpster remember?" He replied looking about as he familiarised himself with his surroundings once more and studying Evan's to-scale Iron Man figurine near the stairs.   
"Do you wanna sleep or shower, or something?" Evan asked him when he made his way to the kitchen where his friend was looking through his fridge. Delirious faltered for a moment on seeing his friend look so small in the big room, hitting home for Delirious the reason he dropped everything to fly to Canada. Evan looked so defeated.   
The words at the back of his head wanted to be heard again. Instead he nodded.   
"Now that you've mentioned it a shower would be great actually."  
Evan smiled politely before leading him up the stairs to the guest bedroom.   
"Take as long as you want man," Evan said throwing a towel to him. "I have to reply to some emails and shit."  
Delirious saluted as he opened his bag. "Aye aye Vanoss!" His friend left chuckling but he sounded exhausted.

Delirious made his way from his room feeling refreshed but anxious on the impending tackling of Evan's situation. The house was quiet but there was a faint blue glow emitting from the end of the hallway. He made his way to the light and awkwardly knocked beside the open door.   
"Evan?" On no response be entered the room. Around the corner his friend was at his desk, lights underneath giving an eerie glow. The laptop and monitors shone blue light on Evan's hunched figure. He had fallen asleep on crossed arms over his laptop. Headphones half off and long hair askew.   
Delirious moved closer. "Evan?" He questioned again. His friends face was slack. Looking at the screen he could see an email open but Evan was lent on the keys, and the letter 'N' was slowly filling the screen.  
Delirious huffed a laugh and gently placed his hands over Evan's large shoulders. His friend slurred a groan.   
"Come on Evan, wake up."  
"I'm awake."  
"Pfffft, sure."  
"I am awake," came the muffled insistence. "I'm just- my side really hurts."  
"Your side?"  
"And my knee actually." He sat up with a frown.  
Delirious matched it. "Did you go to hospital after it happened?" He didn't want to say what 'it' was but also didn't need to, they were both thinking of the bad hockey collision   
"No." Evan replied, taking his headphones off.   
"Did you see a doctor?"  
He hesitated. "....No."  
"Evan!" Delirious bemoaned, why was his friend so stupidly independent?!  
"Sorry." The response was soft, Evan's head low.   
Jon blinked, all rage flooding away.   
"Why would you say that? Don't say that! Don't apologise. God I should apologise!" Those words at the back of his mind, they were gushing forward straight to his mouth. "I'm the one who got you into this mess remember?"  
Evan swivelled around in his chair, almost growling. "You didn't _'get'_ me into anything Delirious. It may have been your idea but the rest was all me. Please don't tell me you've been blaming yourself this whole time."  
Delirious moved away to sit on the nearby couch. He couldn't bare to look at his friend. He did blame himself. He blamed himself for putting the idea into Vanoss's head, blamed his stupid slippery mouth for the other awkward things he'd said which had clearly affected him too. And lastly hated himself even more for wishing he could undo it all in the first place and go back to having a miserable, but safe Evan.   
He took a calming breath. "I just hate to see you get hurt."  
Evan scooted over on his computer chair. The wheels echoed loudly in the room as he rolled over, stopping in front of Delirious.  
"Jon?" Evan's sincere tone forced him to meet his friends eyes. The soft browns were so earnest and warm.   
"Your idea of getting back into hockey was great, honestly. It gave me something else to focus on, another outlet and these past few months, well until recently, it's really made me feel a certain happy contentment I haven't felt since those first few years of YouTube. And just like then, I know now that you're gonna be there even if it falls apart which wouldn't matter because it was so much fun."  
Evan was smiling and all Delirious could do was smile too when thinking back to those early years together. And not just them but the whole group, nerds on YouTube so childishly unaware of their future successes.   
"Wanna play something?" Evan prompted and pushed himself back to his desk, grabbing out two controllers.   
"Always," Jon replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda seems like it could end there but don't worry. It doesn't. That would be weak. Haven't even reached the big climax yet ;)


	9. The hard truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the silence. Was busy and lost motivation. So would  
> love some comments/kudos to help me finish this!!  
> Otherwise, enjoy?

Evan was still asleep when Jon woke up the next day. For an hour he had that awkward feeling of being alone in someone's else's house and was a bit lost with what to do.   
He took his time getting dressed and was on his phone for a bit before deciding to raid his friends fridge for breakfast.   
He was halfway through his bowl of something boring and healthy when Evan came down the stairs. His long hair was in a mess and his clothes rumpled. He groaned when he sat down on the bar stool next to Delirious.   
"Morning," Jon greeted extra cheery. Evan just planted his forehead on the bench in reply.  
"What do you want to do today?" He poked trying to get something from his friend.   
Evan finally lifted his head from the bench, getting up he stumbled his way around the counter to get his own breakfast. He pulled out a container of fruit and slimy pre-boiled eggs. Delirious couldn't help but pull a face of disgust on seeing them.   
"I'm just gonna relax before the big game tomorrow night."  
Jon accidentally bit down on the spoon with surprise. He was about to tread on thin ice and he knew it.  
"Big game?" He queried in a neutral tone. Evan glanced up from his breakfast preparations. Tone also carefully neutral.   
"The semi-final of hockey."  
"I thought..." He stopped, clearly what he'd thought, hoped, had been wrong.   
All of a sudden Evan dropped the fork he was using with a clatter.   
"God damn it what Jon? You thought what?"  
Jon put his hands up in a defensive gesture, taken back by the sudden anger. The ice had cracked and he was falling through. "I just thought you weren't playing anymore. That you'd stopped."  
"Quit you mean? Given up?" Evan's eyes were glinting with his agitation. He hated being told to quit. Even while playing games he was no good at he never rage quit or stopped, would always persist. The previously endearing quality was beginning to frustrate Jon.   
"Quitting is sometimes a good thing," he tried. It didn't work.   
"Quitting doesn't solve my problem! Besides, I should be allowed to play fucking hockey like everyone else. I shouldn't have to hide away."  
Jon wanted to agree with him but also knew what his friend needed was the hard truth but he was so scared to say it.  
"At what cost though Evan?" He kept his voice soft and continued, "Surely being beaten up every week isn't worth it. They're bullying you. And I know you should stand up to bullies but I don't know, not this time."  
Delirious couldn't look at him but from the corner of his eye he could see his friend's knuckles white against the counter. Neither said anything, only because Jon no longer knew what to say. He was meant to be helping but the truth he could see his friend refused to believe.   
Like a true Canadian Evan broke the silence with an apology.  
"I'm sorry."  
Jon shrugged. "Nothing to be sorry for."  
"Once again you were right." His friend admitted causing Jonathan to finally meet his gaze.   
"I should never have shown my face."  
That caught Delirious off guard but Evan ignored his friends shock and ploughed on.   
"I should have done what you did, do. I should have remained anonymous. But at the time, I honestly did want to be admired, personally wanted the recognition. God I wish I could take that back. I could do what I want then. I _could_ play hockey and go shopping, exists outside of YouTube. But I've sold out my own privacy and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life."  
Evan's head hang low and it spurred a determination within Jon to correct it.   
"Evan trust me, what I've done isn't clever, it's cowardice. When it all comes down to it," he took a deep breath. "I'm just so terrified of people seeing me and judging me. Thinking they know me just because they've seen my face. Sure it's great being able to hide in the crowd but it's also a real bitch too."  
Evan was shaking his head in disbelief so Jon kept going.   
"Do you know how much it hurts not being able to be with you guys? Not going to Pax, or to Wildcats or even out to dinner?! And all over Instagram and YouTube I see you guys together having fun and I feel like such a child for not being able to join you. Like I've grounded myself to my room. And honestly sometimes I really hate myself because of it, so either way, our lives are hard. We're famous despite trying to tell ourselves otherwise, and even if we try to hide from it all or we don't, we still aren't free." Finishing his speech Delirious realised he was now standing and slowly sat himself back down on the stool.   
Evan picked up his fork and poked at his fruit and egg breakfast. He had a smile on his face and it was pissing Delirious off.   
"So you wanna finish what you started? Alright fine, I'll be here to help. But for now; what do you want to do today before the game tomorrow? And don't you dare think I won't come and watch bitch!"  
Evan made his way around the counter with his food and plonked himself back down next to his friend. His smile had transformed into a large grin.   
"You kidding? You'd be the first real fan I want there!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking one more BIG final chapter. Won't be as long a wait.


	10. Blood on ice

It was game day, the semi-finals and Delirious was way more nervous then Evan appeared to be who had spent the morning going for a light run and drinking a lot of water.   
Jon left him to it and signed into his YouTube on Evan's system to get work done and let everyone know he wasn't dead. It couldn't last forever though and as much as his presence seemed to help Evan's mood, Delirious was running out of backup videos to make public. He sighed, unsure what to do.   
"Record something here," A voice close behind Jon said out of nowhere causing him to cry out then laugh from his own fright.   
"Sneaking up on me bitch?" He asked spinning in the chair to face Evan.   
Evan winked before leaning on the chair and desk for the mouse and opening Steam.   
"Here, I'll log out and you can use my setup to record a video. You remember your logins?"  
"Yeah," Jonathan replied why thinking that he only did because despite the warnings against it; he did use the same password for everything.   
"Cool," Vanoss opened different applications, setting everything up. "I even have an old shitty mic here for you." He smirked reaching into a draw and pulling out an old mic that would have been alright back in the day.   
Jonathan frowned at all the preparations, and although he was beyond grateful, something was up. "Where are you going then?"  
"To the rink. Gotta be there early for prep stuff," Evan answered crossing his arms in a relaxed pose.   
"Aren't you fucking nervous?" Delirious blurted unable to hide his own anxiety any longer.   
Evan shook his head with a cocky grin, it was so Vanoss like. "Nah man, I've played way more important games then this. This is just a semi-final with a whole bunch of other adults. Just a local club thing ya know?"  
"With other adults who beat you up out of jealousy," Delirious reminded him and Evan nodded.   
"I know that's why I'm gonna take it easy. I'm not going to put 110% in for some bitter office workers who are pissy for missing out on fame and making it to the big leagues. For something that's meant to be a casual round robin competition they take it way too seriously." Evan bent over to put both hands on Jon's shoulders. His eyes glinted with a Vanoss plan. "Don't worry Jon, I'm not going to get hurt for these guys, if it gets too much I'll step back okay? You'll see."  
Delirious took a deep sigh of relief. Letting go of the pressure that had been building inside him over the last 24 hours.   
"I will see," he assured with a smirk. "I'm gonna be there making sure remember?"   
Evan laughed, giving his friends shoulders a quick shake before moving away. "What could go wrong with Delirious looking out for me?" The two shared a smile for a brief moment. "Alright, game starts at 7, I got you an Ubber. Just close the door behind you to lock up."  
"Alright man," Delirious stood, following his friend down to the front. Evan picked up a big duffle bag and another black backpack.   
"Good luck," Jon said as his friend opened the door and quickly added the most important part. "Have fun!"   
Evan rang his own doorbell in reply and Delirious laughed. He watched his friend load up the car before pulling out of the drive. When he was gone from sight he glanced at his phone. He had about two hours, he raced back up stairs and looked through his Steam account for something to record. It was a good distraction until the game, but he couldn't loose the feeling deep in his gut that something was off.

Jon arrived at the rink and joined the waiting crowd. He got his seat near the front and watched the others around him fill. He sent a quick _'I'm here'_ text to Evan and immediately got a stream of random emojis in reply. Jon chuckled putting his phone away as he got caught up in the thrumming energy of all the voices chatting and the lights and music. The ice on the rink seemed to glow.   
Loud squealing stole his attention and he twisted around to see a bunch of about twenty teenage girls finding seats. They were holding loud signs with Evan's logo and name and love hearts. Delirious gritted his teeth, weighing up if he could say something and get away with it. But as he watched them, he saw how young they were, how enthusiastic and excited and Jonathan realised some would be his fans too. Evan was right, how could you deny their love and enthusiasm? Besides they weren't doing anything wrong, it was Evan's own team mates who were hurting him.   
The group found their seats thankfully close but not next to Delirious, they pulled out their phones and started taking selfies. Jon whipped his head back around, scared he'd get found out even though he knew there was no way any of them would know he was also there for Vanoss. Out of curiosity he got out his own phone and searched various ' _Vanoss_ ' tags on Instagram. First result was ' _Vanosshockey_ ' and looking through the tag Jon scrolled passed dozens of pictures and videos of Evan playing and scoring across various matches throughout the hockey season. Already the tag was being filled with new pics.   
The lights suddenly switched and the match was starting with the usual commentaries hyping the crowd along with the loud music and dancing spotlights. Instantly Delirious forgot his phone and became filled with such energy and excitement he once more forgot the nagging feeling of dread and focused on the players gliding out. His eyes quickly picked out Evan and once locked, he found he couldn't look away.   
The teams skated around with fancy footwork and fist-bumps before gliding to their places and getting ready to fight. Evan moved to forward and in the few seconds of silence before kick-off — or whatever it's called in hockey —Delirious heard his own heart thudding in his chest.   
The game burst to life and everyone was in constant motion. It was fast and violent like a video game and Jon instantly loved it, realising why Evan did too. The blades and sticks were loud and cutting against the ice along with the puck and boots scrapping.   
Evan moved forward with his team as they went for goal. Delirious lost sight of the puck but heard the loud clang signifying the goal followed quickly by the refs whistle and a quick tune from the speakers around the rink. The players gave light pats on backs before moving back to positions.   
The game carried on in similar fashion. Always moving quickly from one end of the rink to the other. The team scoring a few and the opponents a few more. Evan always outstripped the other players in speed and got a few goals by himself until he was smashed into the barriers by an opponent. He was on his feet so quick Jon almost missed it but he didn't miss his friends stiffer movements as he skated back into the play. A loud noise sounded the end of the first 20 minutes. The players skated off and Delirious fell back into his seat.

They were in the final twenty minutes of the game and the opponents had gained the lead with Evan's team not showing any sign of catching up.   
The crowd was getting louder and drunker, the players stumbling more, the game's earlier finesse having vanished under fatigue.   
Delirious watched as Evan moved into the fray but got bullied out of the way by his own team mate and was down on the ice. He recovered slower then previously and Jon was no longer caught in the energy of the game, only worried for his friend. The clashes were brutal being fuelled by the booing and cries of the crowd.   
Vanoss scrambled after his team and assisted with the goal but was left clearly panting. As the others celebrated without him, somehow despite all the crowd and action their eyes meet for a split second. The distance couldn't stop Delirious from seeing the glint of frustration and pain in his friends eyes. And although he kept his expression neutral, his face must had given away the real torment he felt as Evan gave a quick nod before moving back to his position.  
Nearby Jon heard the group of girls cheering Evan's name surge once more loud above the noise. He gritted his teeth but didn't look away from his friend.   
It all started again and this time Evan did hang back. He didn't avoid the puck completely but he didn't actively chase it either. He positioned himself to pass it on but no longer attacked the goal, letting the others clash together.   
Eventually the fan club died down and Jon couldn't help but give a small smile. His friend was back in control of the situation. Even his team mates were leaving him alone.   
The game finally finished with the winning opponent team surging together in a group hug. Music played and lights danced. People cheered or angrily complained on the lack of fight on the last period. Delirious was just relieved it was all over and couldn't wait to go home to the peace and quiet with Evan. He was filled with such an overwhelming pride for his friend he couldn't help beam a smile. The fan club of girls filed out muttering amongst themselves in clear disappointment but it couldn't dampen Jon's joy; it was all over.   
The teams had shaken hands before the losers moved off the ice to let the winning team celebrate.   
Delirious watched for a while before his phone vibrated with a text from Evan.   
_'Getting changed then getting the fuck out of here. Meet me downstairs.'_  
Jon pocketed his phone then made his way through the crowd before following a sign reading _'change rooms_ ' pointing downstairs.   
Corridors where lined with lockers and filled with people walking back and forth in gear or clothes. Jon found an indent in the wall where he could wait for his friend out of the way of the crowd.   
Almost twenty minutes passed and Jon was starting to worry. People were starting to give him looks and his texts to Evan were going unanswered. The nagging dread feeling came back full force.  He moved off the wall to look for his friend when he heard shouting and bustling from down the corridor. Hesitantly Jonathan followed the sound before coming up to a larger warm-up room. In the room was half of the losing team. In the middle of that group was Evan, being held by his arms as a big guy laid punches into him.   
"What are you doing?!!" Jonathan yelled from the doorway and they all turned to look. Jon never felt so small or filled with such a white hot anger.   
Evan managed to lift his head and meet eyes from under his fringe. His words from earlier came back to Jon; _"What could go wrong with Delirious looking out for me?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nup. Not quite finished.


	11. Finale on ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan accepts some things are lost but not gone

"Leave him alone!" Delirious pleaded to the hockey players surrounding his friend. All eyes were now on Jon who stood firm against the five gazes with clenched fists.   
"This fucker cost us the finals! Why are you defending him?!" The guy that had been doing the punching demanded, voice filled with venom.   
"He's the fucker that got you this far dumb shits." Delirious might only be good at fighting in games, but he knew how to talk big. None of the hockey players moved, uncertainty creeping in.   
"So I'll say it again; leave him alone."  
"You another fan?" One of the guys holding Evan piped up. "You in love with him too."  
Jon's face burned and he involuntarily took a protective step forward.   
"I'm his best friend bitches and you better scram," he paused to whip out his phone and started filming. "Before this goes viral and as you know how popular Vanoss is; believe me, this will go viral. Imagine fighting 22 million of me."  
The guy dropped his hold on Evan and the other did the same. Vanoss fell to the ground with a thud and a groan.   
"Pfffft, whatever," the leader said with an attempt of an indifferent shrug but was the quickest to awkwardly scoot around Delirious to the door.   
Jon made sure to keep filming them leave and waited the few moments till he was sure they were gone.  
He'd never done such a thing before in his life and wasn't filled with the sense of power or strength he expected but an intense rush of relief and a sudden need to cry.   
He pocketed his phone and turned around, Evan was now on his hands and knees. Jon made his way over and crouched down next to him. His head was down but eyes scrunched in obvious pain. Tears were collecting on Evan's cheeks and mixing with his blood.   
Delirious placed a gentle hand on his friend's shoulder. "You okay?"  
"Yeah," Evan huffed out around strained gulps of air. "I'll be alright, just give me a minute."  
"Should I call an ambulance?" Jon asked, not trusting Evan's admission.  
"No!" He insisted and straightened up on his knees as if to prove it, hand on Delirious' shoulder for support. "I'll be alright really." His face was glistening with tears and sweat that mixed wet with the blood from his cut cheek. His fringe was plastered to his forehead but his eyes were strong. "Jesus Jon, thank you so much," he gushed pulling him close and placing both arms right around him. Jon hugged back gingerly, not wanting to hurt Vanoss but he didn't seem to care as they hugged on the rubber floor mats on their knees. "I'm a fucking idiot, a proud stupid idiot." He could feel Evan murmur into his shoulder and feeling the wetness from tears, knew his friend believed it to be true.   
"You think you're an idiot?! I just took on five big hockey guys on my own! Me!"  
Evan chuckled and Jon felt it beneath his hands on Evan's back and in his own chest, it was beyond reassuring.   
"And you won," Evan replied pulling away and awkwardly wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.   
Jon shook his head and keeping both hands on Evan's shoulders corrected. "You won too, they didn't get their glory of the finals and you stood up to their bullying."  
Evan gave another sniff and chuckle. "That's really lame man."  
Jon emitted one of his famous laughs in return. "You know I'm not good with talking dude." He stood and offered his hand down to Evan who accepted it and stumbled to his feet with a groan. His eyes were still pinched tight with pain and he held and arm protectively around his middle.   
"I think you need to go to hospital." Delirious suggested once more.   
"I really just wanna go home," Evan whined. "Nothing serious. Please? Jon, I wanna go home. I've had enough of people looking at me."  
Jon sighed but nodded, unable to refuse the big pleading owl eyes of his friend. "Alright then, let's get the fuck out of here."

At home Jon got all the ice and frozen vegetables he could find and helped Evan apply them to his large bruises. They sat on the couches, Jon holding frozen peas to a deep bruise on the back of Evan's shoulder who held his own two bags on his cheek and ribs. Sitting shirtless and iced he shivered so Jon moved to turn the heating right up and get a blanket for his lap.   
They didn't talk about the incident, wanting to move on from the night. Instead they watched old GTA V videos that Evan hated but Delirious loved. He ordered them pasta and they laughed at their past selves and their friends.

Jon woke up to something prodding his foot. Blinking he glanced around to see his legs stretched out under the blanket on the lap of a half awake Evan, who was trying to remove said legs.   
"Ugh what time is it?" Delirious questioned groping blindly around himself for his phone.   
"Bout 11," Evan replied finally pushing his friends legs off now he was awake and standing stiffly with a wince.   
"How you feeling?" Jon asked wincing himself at the bruise on Evan's cheek.  
"Like I almost got beaten to a pulp," he groaned running his hands through his hair. "But the icing helped and I'll be better after a shower. Come on," he started around the couch and patted Jon's messy hair as he passed. "We're gonna head down to the rink after we grab some breakfast, lunch...brunch, whatever. I left all my gear there."  
Jon stretched his arms high above his head before standing too. Noticing the unarmed dark shadow that had been lurking so slightly behind his friend's eyes had completely vanished. Technically such a thing was all in Jon's head but still, it put him in a good mood.

Down at the rink, Jon was up against the railing watching the big machine finish resurfacing the ice.   
"Hey Jon!" He heard a voice behind him and turned to see Evan standing near the gate with skates on and another pair in his hands. From the shit eating grin on his face, Jon knew this had been the real plan of brining him to the rink. With a nervous heavy weight in his gut he made his way over to his friend who showed him how to lace up the skates.   
"I hate you. This was a trap I knew it. Probably from the very start. Probably from when I suggested taking up hockey again." He wobbled his way onto his feet and over to Evan waiting at the gate on the ice.   
"You probably planned back then to get in trouble knowing I'd fly up to this frozen wasteland to help you, just so you could eventually trick me into ice skating just to see me fall flat on my ass."  
"I did not. Here," Evan stretched out his hand and as Delirious stepped onto the ice he latched on, thankfully of his friends own confident stance and firm grip.   
"Fuck, fuck, fuck your make this look so easy." He grumbled allowing to be lead away from the edge while his friend laughed.   
"Baby steps Jon, literally. Don't try to skate just step."  
He did, awkwardly and fumbling. Struggling with the unfamiliar weight of the boots and thinness of the blades. He would have fallen if Evan didn't offer his supporting arm.   
He managed to stumble around on his own for a few minutes. Cursing his friend and the ice the whole time. Evan glided up to him again, hands out reassuringly.   
"You're really not that bad, just-" Evan was cut off as Delirious dramatically slipped backwards onto his own ass. Evan helped him back up with a stifled laugh, grabbing both hands. "Here just keep your knees slightly bent and toes pointing forward."  
Slowly Evan began skating backwards, pulling Jon gently with him along the ice.   
As Delirious gained confidence in the movement he began to laugh, enjoying the easy feeling of being pulled along like a sled. They glided around the empty rink till Evan let go and Jon slid on his own until the momentum ran out. He twisted around to see Evan performing lazy twists and turns then stopping dead still and with a Vanoss glint in his eyes, pumping his legs in a sprint and racing straight to Jon who squealed before Evan dodged around him at the last second. Ankles swaying side to side and feet swerving he turned around again and stopped in front of Jon in a spray of ice that reached Jon's lips.  
"Show off," he mumbled and dusted the powder off his hoodie.   
Evan smirked in reply, "this is actually just my warm down from last night."  
"Oh," Delirious frowned, there was no denying it was still impressive. "It's almost like you've been skating since you were six." He sarcastically quipped and Evan flipped him off and skated away.   
Jon continued to try and skate on his own once more, enjoying the feeling a lot more now he'd had a proper taste and wanting to achieve it again. Eventually Evan meet him in the middle and slowly pulled him around the rink again. He had the biggest smile on his face and the brightest glint in his eyes. He'd been telling the truth from the very start; he loved it and he would always want to come back onto the ice and experiencing it himself now, Jon did too.   
"Having fun?" The asked each other at the same time and Evan blushed.   
"I am." Jon confirmed and after a pause dared to add, "I'm sorry hockey's kinda been ruined for you though."  
Evan swerved in a different direction suddenly and Delirious cursed as he fumbled to correct with him. Evan laughed, "You've been in Canada too long, apologising like one of us."  
He had been too long but he didn't regret it. "You know I have to go back home soon?"   
Evan nodded, smile fading as he was reminded of their realities.   
"I know. I'm so grateful you came in the first place. I'd be in a hospital right now if it wasn't for you."  
"Yep, Batcoon saved Night Owl's ass!" He chuckled in response. They slowed to a stop in the middle of the rink.   
"Will Night Owl be okay now? When Batcoon leaves," Delirious queried and Evan gave a reassuring smile.   
"Yeah I think I can accept my fame a bit better now. As much as I miss playing hockey, it's a lifestyle I gave up for a reason. It's either one or the other, not both. And unlike hockey, YouTube has made me some great friends." He finished with a wink.  
Jon was filled with awkward embarrassment at the honesty of the words but was proud of Evan for having the courage to face it.   
"You might have lost hockey Evan but it's not taken away from you. It's your past and childhood, doesn't mean you can never go back to it. Sure you can't play competitively like you did before the fame but it's not lost forever, it's always there. But," he paused, struggling to find the right words. "But you've got this amazing future and life that you've made for yourself ahead of you now. And if or when you move on from YouTube or music, it doesn't matter cause we'll still be friends, until we're old. Things might change but they're not gone. Now, my legs are killing me can I go sit down?"  
Evan guided him over to the gate without a word but Jon wasn't worried knowing his friend was just thinking everything over. He stood there in his jeans and boomer jacket on the ice looking a bit lost as Delirious started to unlace his skates.   
"You can keep skating Evan. Skate as long as you want, I'm happy to wait and watch till your done."  
With a nod and a smile his friend quickly turned and sprinted across the ice, performing amateur tricks and spins. He was the only figure on the whole rink. He was alone, but Delirious was also right there with him even from a distance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it. I really hope people enjoyed it, I know I had fun writing it and even more; finishing it. 
> 
> Well let me know any final thoughts and as Nogla would say;  
> "I hope he enjoyed"

**Author's Note:**

> I apologise for any mistakes present or in the future.


End file.
